What Leaders Get Wrong About Resilience — and How to Do Better

“Resilience” is everywhere these days. We see it in leadership trainings, performance reviews, even recruitment ads: “We need resilient employees.” “Our culture builds resilience.”

But too often, resilience is framed as something people need to carry on their own. The quiet message becomes: “If you can’t handle the pressure, maybe you’re not cut out for this.”

That framing isn’t just incomplete — it can unintentionally work against inclusion and belonging.

The Limits of “Individual Resilience”

When organizations treat resilience as a personal trait, the burden often falls heaviest on employees who are already navigating systemic barriers.

Women, BIPOC employees, LGBTQ2+ folks, neurodiverse employees, and those living with disabilities are too often asked to “bounce back” in environments that weren’t designed with them in mind.

This doesn’t just risk burnout — it risks exclusion.

A Better Approach: Collective Resilience

What if resilience wasn’t about teaching people to tough it out, but about shaping systems that support them when things get tough?

Instead of asking, “Why aren’t employees tougher?” the better question is:

👉 “What structures, spaces, and supports can we build so employees don’t have to spend all their energy just surviving?”

That’s collective resilience: the shift from personal grit to shared care. It’s how organizations create conditions where people can thrive — not just endure.

Practical Shifts for Leaders

1. Audit Culture, Not Just People: Burnout isn’t an individual weakness. Examine workloads, policies, and meeting norms that disproportionately drain employees — especially those at the margins.

2. Build Recovery Into the System: Beyond wellness apps or EAPs, create intentional spaces — physical and cultural — where people can pause, reset, and restore their energy.

3. Model Human Leadership: When leaders set boundaries, ask for help, or lean on community, they normalize resilience as a shared practice instead of a solo performance.

4. Make Belonging a Business Strategy: Teams with high psychological safety recover faster, adapt more creatively, and stay longer. Belonging isn’t a “soft” extra — it’s a measurable driver of resilience and retention.

   
   

Why This Matters

When leaders shift from resilience as individual toughness to resilience as collective care, they don’t just reduce burnout. They make inclusion real.

Because here’s the truth: people shouldn’t have to burn themselves out just to prove they belong.

That’s the future of resilience — and the future of work.

✨ At HELD, we help leaders design care-centered systems and spaces that strengthen belonging while supporting organizational performance. If you’re ready to move past “grit” and build a culture where people can show up fully, let’s start the conversation.

To learn more about how HELD Agency can support you create spaces of care and decompression, visit our Services page.

Chris/teen Salik (she/they) writes about decompression spaces, peer support, and collective care. She focuses on initiatives that build a culture of belonging, and trains Active Listeners to hold space for their coworkers and community members. Click here to learn more.